shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
