so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
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