Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
dude i'm inner monologue high
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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