have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
