I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize