I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
