I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
she told me i tasted like america
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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