Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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