Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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