I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize
