I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
