I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
