apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Randomize
