3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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