Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
