I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize
