The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
