his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize