Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize