If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
