Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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