ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
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