There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize