So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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