how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
