the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
