her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
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