Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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