I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
