she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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