I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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