I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
