i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
