i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Just took my morning after pill in the library
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize