OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize