We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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