you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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