We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
