i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
