I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
