You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Boobs speak an international language.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
