I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
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