just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
