fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
