Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
