Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
