Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Randomize
