Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
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