well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
