He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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