Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
