Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
