this just has baby written all over it
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
