She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
